“God formed us originally for himself…”

—JOHN NEWTON on “Social Affections”

“God formed us originally for himself, and endued the human mind with a capacity which he alone can fill. But when he dwells in the heart, there is still room for innumerable objects of complacency [that is, pleasantness], in their proper subordinate order. When a woman marries, she may continue to love her own parents and relatives as formerly; she may extend her affection and regard to the parents and friends of her husband; in a course of years the number of those whom she loves and values may be greatly increased, without interfering with each other, or with what she owes to her husband; but there is a different and special regard due to him, which if she should transfer to another person, she would be criminal. Thus we may love, and we ought to love, our husbands, wives, children, parents, and friends; and if we consider them as the Lord’s gifts—if we seek his blessing in  them and upon them—if we hold them at his disposal—if we employ all our influence with them, to engage them to seek and love him supremely—if, when they are removed from us, we are disposed to yield a cheerful submission to his holy will—and if, when things are brought into competition, we rather choose to venture displeasing our dearest friends, than to sin against the Lord—with these restrictions we cannot easily love them too much.”

—JOHN NEWTON on ‘Social Affections’ in Works vol. 4 (2015 edition), p. 664.